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It’s Okay to Have a Bad Day (or three)

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Welp, some (if not most) of you may know that I’ve had a rough couple of days. I won’t go into details because some bits are personal and other parts aren’t necessarily worthy of my time and energy (as if they haven’t already been taxing enough), or yours for that matter. However, I did want to share a little epiphany I’ve had during this downhill period, and most of you have probably figured this ‘life lesson’ out by now, but I’m sharing anyway for those of us who can be kind of stubborn and dense when it comes to those ‘life lessons.’

You know that ‘bad day’ mentality, where no matter what happens, everything sucks, even though things really aren’t that bad in life? I realize that when I say ‘everything sucks‘ I may lose a certain degree of credibility, as it isn’t the most eloquent way to express myself, but really, it’s the only phrase I find semi-fitting.

Well. I had one of those mentalities for a few days, I shared my frustration with the world, and they shared their feedback with me. I received many responses in attempts to console my cynicism and bitterness: sympathy, empathy, support and encouragement from friends and family. But for whatever reason, I still didn’t feel better. I appreciated the people who reached out, and no doubt it helped some (much love and thanks to ya’ll), but it didn’t cure all. It felt nice to know I wasn’t alone (because my irrational and emotional self told me I was), but why didn’t I feel all better?

I was told to remember my blessings, which is always a good thing to do. I was told my life is good, I have a healthy, growing baby and a great husband, and I absolutely do. But does that mean I can’t have a bad day? Of course not.

I came across a quote that changed my perspective on this:

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I have a great life, and I know that. It isn’t perfect, nor is it easy, but it is great. I am incredibly blessed, and again, I know that. I’m so grateful that after working (unpaid) from 7p.m.-7a.m. (and getting home at 9a.m.) my husband has neatly laid out my slippers, fuzzy socks, sweats and sweatshirt so I can throw off my awful uniform, throw up my hair, curl up in a ball and attempt to rest. But some days, that clarity is diminished.

Life gets hard for one reason or another, and that’s just part of the ride. And so ‘bad days’ come along, and they are allowed to, and I label it as a ‘bad day’ and feel all those special feelings that accompany it, and I’m allowed to.

Does this mean I’m a horrible, awful, ungrateful person? Personally, I don’t think so at all. I can love my life, and remember my blessings, but I don’t have to ‘have it’ together every minute of every day, because I’m human! Please allow me to be. Because I’m not saying my life is bad, I’m simply saying my day could have been better (although I can be so dramatic and bratty and attribute it to my life).

So yesterday, I still couldn’t shake the grumpies and called my mom crying. She’s a nurse too, and while at work, she took my call, and just listened to me cry, and loved me. I’m a married woman, I’m expecting a baby of my own, and here I am calling my mom on the phone like I’m a kid again. But I realized I just wanted to be heard, supported and loved.

Despite noble intentions to lift someone’s spirits, sometimes it makes people feel guilty for not being optimistic 100% of the time. No doubt, I’ve felt this way. It isn’t cake to be completely unwavering in faith, and it doesn’t quite help when we’re told how great we have it, and I’m totally guilty of doing this before! I’ll be the first to admit it.

So, let’s resolve to just be there for others and say, “I’m sorry you’re having a bad day, do you want to talk about it?” Because they are certainly allowed to have a bad day too.

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